this is your life... by Rev. Juliet Nightingale, experiencer/author/ http://www.towardthelight.org

    One of the first things I remember experiencing was the life review - which included everything that I’d experienced in my physical incarnation up to that point.  It was like being at the cinema - watching a movie of my life and everything happening simultaneously. 

    I think most NDErs will agree that, the life review is one of the most difficult aspects of the NDE.  Viewing your entire life before you - with every thought, word, action, etc.- can be most unsettling, indeed.  Yet, what happened was the fact that no one passed judgement on me!  I only felt the constant enveloping of divine love from the Being of Light that was always with me. 

     What I came to realise, then, is that we judge ourselves!  There was no ‘he-god’ sitting on some throne, passing judgement on me, (not that I even expected to see such a being in the first place).  I never subscribed to such religious myths anyway. 

     I seemed to be the only one who was uncomfortable and most critical of myself.  Yet, having stated that, I also realised that I wasn’t coming from a vantagepoint of the ‘ego self’ but, rather, from my soul self that was much more detached, and having no feelings of being emotionally charged, etc.   I was no longer identifying with the personality of the physical self.  Therefore, what I felt was very different - coming from a completely different perspective as the soul self - my True Identity.

     Even though I was no longer in my physical body, I did have form - a body of sorts.  The best way I can describe this is that I felt like a bubble - floating and moving about effortlessly - sometimes very fast…or gently drifting about.  I felt hollow inside and so clear--even having a sensation of a breeze blowing inside of me. There was never any sense of hunger, thirst, weariness or pain.  Such things never entered my mind, in fact! 

     I was pure consciousness, embodied in a light and ethereal form, travelling about…or being still and observing intently…and always in a state of awe.  It was such a glorious sensation where I experienced such calm and a profound sense of peace and constant trust.  I also experienced no blindness, (as I do with my physical eyes being legally blind), and what a sense of awe and wonder - to be able to see!

     At one point, I perceived myself as being on a guided tour, as it were - visiting and observing different places, beings and situations - some very pleasant and some very painful.  The best way I can describe this ‘tour’ was like being in a circular enclosure of windows - each pane revealing something different…but when I’d focus on one particular pane, I’d suddenly see the pane become full size (much like a ‘window’ on your computer monitor becoming full screen) and I stood still - just watching… 

     One pane revealed a scene that one might interpret as a ‘hell’ or ‘purgatory’ where faceless, grey coloured entities moved about aimlessly and moaned.  They were clearly suffering and in great agony and anguish.  I saw these souls as damaged souls - ones who had committed unspeakable atrocities during their previous incarnations.  I have used the analogy of a soul being ‘retrograde’ - much in the way a planet will have the appearance of going backwards. 

     The prevailing feeling that I had whilst observing these souls was one of deep compassion and a yearning to comfort them.  I wanted so much to see them relieved of their horrible suffering. 

     But as painful as this scene was, I was reassured that these souls were here only temporarily and that they, too, would heal and move back in a forward direction and ultimately return to the Light.  All souls, without exception, eventually return to the Light…according to what was revealed to me.

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non-judgment day.... By Linda Stewart, experiencer and moderator, nde@yahoogroups.com

     I was a good person, moral, honest, friendly, fair, kind, hospitable, a charitable person, good and loyal wife, a loving and thoughtful mother, and a steadfast friend (and lest I am beginning to sound like a saint or girl scout, let me add), I was also fearful, vain, greedy, controlling, egotistical and judgmental.

     Me, the liberal who sounded off loudly against prejudice, repression, inequality, thoughtless pollution, etc., etc., etc. I had been judgmental with my old thinking. I was no saint. I wasn’t even sure I deserved to go to Heaven even though I tried so very hard to accumulate scores of through good works.

     And yet I stood in the glowing, loving presence of God, the very Creator and was beheld as perfect. How could I, little ole’ me, judge any other person, situation, or thing on this earth when I had not been judged?

     Our heavenly attendants on the other side are loving, supportive and non-judgmental. When we have our life review before the Heavens, it is we who will judge ourselves. We will see and finally understand the consequences of our actions and even our thoughts upon God’s children. To feel and experience the pain we have afflicted upon others and the ripple effect that spreads out exponentially is embarrassing and humbling when seen from the perspective of love. It is also clarifying and life altering.

Before my NDE, I had spent my every waking moment stridently, fearfully defending my life against the God I was supposed to love. My titanic efforts to prove myself through my art and good works were designed to establish my value. I felt by leaving an indelible mark on the world through accomplishments in art and good deeds, and lining up as many accolades and kudos as possible on my shelf of insecurity, I would document my indispensable value and could validate my right to exist. That dependence upon myself changed when, at the moment of my last breath I had yielded my will unto death....

     I had prayed often and earnestly during my life, my entreaties had always been about my needs, desires and fears. That prayer of submission and asking to be of service was probably the first honest, unselfish prayer of my life. When I finally put my life in God’s hands, I yielded my will unto life.

     After relinquishing my belief that I was in charge of my life and knew what was best for me, and instead, listened for direction from the voice within that remembered God, I found a renewed interest in life. I had, after all, been sent back for a reason. I began to approach each day with the faith that whatever life presented was exactly and perfectly right for me. That belief and trust in inner guidance led me on a journey of self-discovery.

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